It appears to me that a lot of couples these days, forget who they started out being. Many couples forget their roots. Once they become a couple, they often lose track of the reasons why they bonded in the first place. Why is that? Do we really change all that much? I don't think so. So why then do we so often start to drift apart? Often we just get comfortable and lazy. To repair the damage, an active program of preventative maintenance is required.
Think about your relationship, and how you and your lover interacted when the relationship was new—likely there was there more kissing, touching, texting and bantering than now . Sending those little love notes or messages to each other throughout the day does wonders in moving a relationship forward. It all used to come so easy with the excitement of having a new partner - do we have to let that excitement die? Some relationships were never meant to last, but of those that are, it is important that we actively pursue success. Failure is not just about stress. All these issues were probably the ones that made us closer in the first place.
We fall into a pattern- we get lazy. Both partners get into their comfort zone, and let things go,and before you know it their at that point where they never thought they'd be. Men for instance, start ogling more at other women, and making comments about how good looking they are, and they forget about the one their with. Women might take a look at the cute butt of some hot guy, and romanticize about them. The point is we stop complimenting each other, and for the person at the other end of this scenario it can be quite a let down. We make each other feel less attractive, less desireable and less needed. Most times were even afraid to say something for fear of upsetting the other person even though their actions have made us angry. Women you need to speak up, and express your disapproval, and men you need to listen without getting your backs up, and vice versa. We must always be sensitive to our partner's feelings - relationships take work, and when both partners work at it - it grows into a lasting romance. Here are a few things we can do to make our relationships stay healthy:
1) Make a conscious effort to compliment your partner on a daily basis- you will be surprised at how how much a compliment means to your partner, and how good it makes them feel
2) Love them and tell them that you love them. Never force them to assume that you love them
3) Men stop ogling and women stop checking out cute butts.
4) Honesty.....no one likes to be lied to so why do it. Tell each other everything, it will produce conversation
5) No matter how busy you are, and other than sleeping at night, make sure you set aside at least an hour a day to be alone together
6) Communicate- tell your partner how you feel, and work things out before they become worse than they are.
7) Start your day off with a kiss and a statement that re-enforces your love and commitment to each other.
8) Be relaxed and do not be afraid of public displays of affection – some public kissing and tenderness will exhibit to the world how you care about your partner and broadcast to them that you love them and want to make sure that everyone knows it
9) Don't be so serious...Laugh, smile, you know that saying “Partners that laugh together stay together” Its so true.....
10) Make a point of never going to bed angry- whatever is bothering you talk it out, its not worth losing sleep over, and it starts your next day on a negative note. Make some time to snuggle when you get into bed....create a good night ritual. Some couples just get into their own sides of the bed, and that's it. I don't know about you, but that is not my idea of a Good Night. Take a few moments to caress, and make going to sleep a wonderful thing knowing that you will be waking up beside your Prince or Princess in the morning.
Relationships are not work at all once you develop the habits of endearment that make any relationship thrive.
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